This is Sammy, Our amazing four year old son.
When Sammy was two, and wasn't talking, he started seeing a speech path. Shortly thereafter, she suggested he might have autism. Rather than listen to her suggestions, we were angry with her. How dare she insult our little boy!?
We spent the next six months researching autism with the goal of proving (to ourselves) that she was wrong. We were unsuccessful. We finally decided to entertain the idea and took him for an evaluation.
By this point in time we had figured out that it was more than just delayed speech, and had determined that it was going to be okay.... But then we got that piece of paper, that dreadful paper, and reality set in. Regardless of how prepared we thought we were, Sammy's official diagnosis hit us like a freight train and nearly cost us our marriage. We both alternated between acceptance and depression (deep, dark depression) We mourned the loss of the son we had hoped for - and felt guilty for feeling that way.
But we dove in, started ABA therapy, speech, OT, feeding therapy, etc. Our lives completely changed. Sammy had sleeping troubles, dietary issues, gastrointestinal issues, sensory issues, etc. We had to learn to function on roughly half the sleep we were accustomed to and learn to be on the alert 24/7.
Today, life is much better. The whole family has gotten used to our routine. Sleep remains an issue, and Sammy's calendar is busier than most adults I know, but life is good.
To anyone just starting on this journey, know that there will be trials, know that there will be painful moments - but know that it will get easier, and your child's smile will make it all worth while. You are about to learn what love means on a level that most people will never understand.
On youtube, give the song "Your Child" by Jennifer Shaw a listen.
Portland, OR